In April of 2014 my five year old daughter, Susanna, suffered a ruptured brain aneurysm with no known symptoms. She was sleeping in her car seat on the way home from visiting her grandmother. We lost her the following afternoon. Her death catapulted me into a new way of being. I am lost, bereaved and unsure . I have always loved to write, and sharing my words helps to sort through remnants and pull together another life as best I can. Any doubts I had about the continuation of life beyond what we know on earth are dissolved. I put one foot in front of the other and go on not without Susanna, but looking and listening for her in a different way.

When Susanna was three years old, she came to me at dinnertime in one of many princess gowns. She said, “Mommy, I need lips and hair. I am going to the Golden Ball.” I believe she is still dancing and loving and learning on the other side. I feel her calling to me and everyone who can hear her to do the same, in time.

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